So it's been 2 weeks since I've been in Wollongong.
I must say that I've probably learnt more about myself in these 2 weeks than I did the whole of last year.
I learnt that I can miss people, miss home, and be strong enough to want to stay here rather than escape home.
I learnt that I can actually be independent, living on my own.
I learnt that I can fend for myself, to make my own adult decisions.
I learnt that I can manage my time well, balancing settling into a new place, forming new social circles, and achieving my learning goals.
I learnt what it's like to walk in the shoes of someone belonging to a minority race. Being a chinese living in Singapore, I never had faced discrimination of any sort. In Australia, on my first couple of days here, we already experienced, albeit to a minor extent, what it feels like to be on the outside looking in.
I learnt the joys of cooking. I experienced the satisfaction of preparing your own meals. I have never washed so many dishes in my life before, and wow it feels pretty darn good to feel like a fully functioning adults.
I learnt that I am so much stronger mentally and emotionally than I ever thought I would be. I got this. And I regret nothing. I'll make it through the year.
I learnt that there are so many smart and brilliant people in Honours year, and I'm so psyched to learn from them.
I learnt that Honours isn't a competition.
I learnt that no matter how much you think you know, there's always something to be learnt from everyone.
I learnt that insecurities that plagued me a year or two ago, has been unconsciously overcome and now no longer bother me.
I learnt that as much as you grow past old insecurities, new ones will always surface. But that's okay, because like the ones I overgrew, I will evolve past these new ones in time to come.
I learnt that it's perfectly okay to be afraid of what the future entails. If you ask the 18 year old me if I would ever be pursuing my studies overseas, I wouldn't have said yes. And I'm such an avid planner, I planned my education and career path since I was 16. It didn't exactly go the way I wanted it to, but I loved every experience I had so far. And I learnt so much from people I never thought I would have the chance to meet.
I learnt that it's okay to step out of my comfort zone. I've always been on the safe side, doing what I normally do. But doing something totally new on my own, such as going for a new genre of dance by myself in a city where I hardly know anyone, might make me a little uncomfortable initially. But I will always grow and adapt, and these new experiences will uniquely change the way I see the world.
I learnt that it is fine to say no to yourself. To not set expectations based on people's experiences or experiences I view from movies or shows. To be flexible, adaptable, and make my own experience unique.
I learnt that I survive. There are times when I thought I wouldn't get past an issue, or a daunting experience, but I always do.
And I learn that I make my own year, and I'm going to have a great one.
